The Joy in Moving through Motherhood at a Toddler’s Pace –
As a mom with young children, you might feel swept up in the hustle and bustle of daily life, overwhelmed by juggling all the responsibilities, and resentful about all those hurried expectations of you.
Even though my own children are well past diaper changes and sippy cup spills, I still know well how frenetic many of the moments of motherhood can feel. (Hello, first week of school/early alarms/packed book bags/forms to sign/bells to beat… agghh!)
In all the never-ending to-do lists and the demands of modern-day motherhood, it actually might feel impossible for you to slow down. And it’s so easy to inadvertently miss out on what can actually be fulfilling about being a parent when we are all just trying to keep up with the obnoxious pace.
So this week, I’m diving into some micro ways us moms can better slow it down, savor the present, and even embrace the (sometimes excruciating) pace of a toddler, so you too can find a little more joy in the journey of motherhood.
Look for Joy in the Little Moments –
Little humans have an uncanny way of finding wonder and joy in the simplest of things – like a butterfly fluttering by, a leaf falling from a tree, or a puddle to jump in (the muddier the better, if yours are anything like my son). These are magical moments for them, since so much of the world is still unfamiliar and new, and fascinating!
As a mom, you too can appreciate life's small wonders by slowing down and experiencing the world around you through your child's eyes. Next time you’re wading your way through a grassy field or bubbly stream (or probably rather a bustling Target or Costco parking lot), really look around you and notice the colors, the sounds, the micro-systems of bugs and brush (and buggies) the way your child might see them. For me, I try to notice their questions and how they arrive at them sometimes; the beauty of a growing mind is enough to slow me down for a moment sometimes and there’s always a joyful feeling when I see their minds light up!
By taking a cue from your little one's curiosity and pausing more to appreciate the tiniest details around you and them, you'll not only create lasting memories together but also find the gratitude (and real joy) that’s possible in your experience as a mom wherever you go.
Embrace Playfulness –
Kids are masters of play and turning everyday objects into delightful adventures. (I have a storage room full of all my Amazon boxes for this very reason!). Play is something that you do for enjoyment and fun, rather than for any specific goal or outcome, and the key elements (how you know it’s play) are when you move through the experience with spontaneity, creativity, freedom, and curiosity.
If you can, find just a few minutes a day to get on your child’s level, follow their lead, and allow them to choose an activity they enjoy or suggest one of your own. See if you can let go of inhibitions and tap into your own imagination with storytelling, role-play, or free movement with your body. Sing silly songs while getting dressed, make a game out of cleaning up, or set aside a few minutes of a task (like dishes or bath time) to let them “work” with you! For us I (sometimes) squeeze in 10 minutes of play right when we get home (and before the frenzy of an evening routine begins), by kicking around a soccer ball together or interacting in a game on the trampoline.
In whatever you find that works for you to tap into a toddler's pace – only if for a minute or two a day – you not only strengthen the bond with your child, but you can also find the joy of being fully present in their world (which often is more fun anyway!).
Prioritize Presence Over Perfection –
In a culture that glorifies perfection, it's important to remember that the real joy of motherhood lives in just being present with your child when you can. Even though I know that oh-so-angsty feeling of piled up dishes and unfolded laundry all too well too, what actually feels more meaningful is the connection you plug into when you ditch the duties and slow down with them a little instead.
The best way to prioritize slower presence is to first understand that no one can be a perfect parent, ever. Practice self-compassion when you make mistakes, be flexible when things don't go as planned, and embrace moments together more mindfully by really noticing your interactions together. Find wholehearted ways to engage with your child, if only for a moment or two at a time; see their curiosities, listen to their laughter, and savor the wonder of all that they’re learning about the world. At my house, this might look like a few extra minutes of sleepy snuggles before bed, reading an interesting book, or talking about our day together (while pieces of dinner on the floor and parent folders still wait for me downstairs).
By slowing down and practicing presence vs. perfection as a mom, you’re not just nurturing the bonds with the little beings you’re raising everyday – you also can find delight in the precious moments of real connection, where the joy of motherhood truly lives.
Learn from their Resilience –
Little humans are naturally curious and eager to explore the world, even if it means stumbling and falling down along the way. Their resilience and determination are inspiring reminders that growth only comes from taking risks and overcoming challenges. As moms, we can adopt a similar mindset and embrace the uncertainties of parenthood with openness to growth and learning too!
To slow down and practice more resilience in motherhood, start by observing your child’s own adaptability to setbacks, changes or difficulties. This might look like an all-out tantrum and tearful protest at first, but really pay attention to how they eventually move through it and meet the other side of a transition. Can you also approach challenges with a sense of curiosity and a willingness to explore solutions? Can you adapt to new situations yieldingly and let go of your failures and future worries, knowing that you too are growing through effort and learning?
This one is especially near and dear to me lately, as my littlest has struggled more lately with separation anxiety. I’m always amazed to hear from caregivers that he’s “doing much better” or even enjoying himself after a particularly hard drop off, and I’m inspired again by the ability kids truly do have to bounce back.
By observing, learning from, and even emulating your own little one’s resilient pace, you too can cultivate a more positive mindset that helps you navigate motherhood challenges with more meaningful joy.
Conclusion –
In a world that moves at breakneck speed, the journey of motherhood can actually offer us an opportunity to slow down, savor, and embrace the present moment. Because toddlers are such experts at finding joy in the little moments, getting playful, being present, and bouncing back with impressive resilience, they are really the best model we could have to grow these parts in ourselves (and our joy)!
When you learn to slow it down and move more at their pace instead – even for a moment – you get to connect with life's small pleasures and feel more of the real joy that’s possible in the journey.
Do you need support with slowing down in motherhood? Reach out to work 1:1 with me, or learn about other ways I can help! I would so love to help you discover your own joyfully slow (and toddler-like) pace as a mom.🌷
